I'm not partial to overtly subjective reviews, yet I can't seem to find any better way of relating my response to Isabel Coixet's latest film, Elegy, an adaptation of Philip Roth's novel "The Dying Animal," which follows the romance between a college professor and his much younger former student. First, though, a note of appropriateness: early in the film, this professor, the Roth regular David Kepesh, who previously appeared in the novels "The Breast" and "The Professor of Desire," is lecturing about how literature, specifically Tolstoy's "War and Peace," will be appreciated differently by a reader at different points in his or her life. In ten years, for example, it may seem like a new book entirely.

Perhaps in ten years, then, or more likely in thirty, I will be able to watch Elegy again and have a new perspective. Maybe I will be able to relate to Kepesh, here portrayed by Ben Kingsley, when I am in my sixties and have similarly lived and experienced as much. Yet the fact that Coixet's film is so depressing makes me almost hope that I never actually live so long to find out. I should have known, what with the filmmaker's past films, such as My Life Without Me, with their gray atmospheres and dreary dealings with illness and death. While appearing on the outside to be a sexy drama about how one lecherous old man discovers love, Elegy is on the inside really just a slow, uninteresting depiction of a selfish fool who possibly too-late realizes that he's grown old before he's actually grown up.

Hey, when did the LA Times become the new Cinematical (ahem ... and ahem)?

We've got such craziness this week with two big summer films landing in theaters on Wednesday instead of Friday. No, you don't have some fancy holiday weekend coming up (sorry cubicle dude), but the Olympics do begin later this week, and, well, some of us really want to get our Women's Swimming 100m Butterfly on. That said, those mid-weekers have a choice between the weed action/comedy Pineapple Express and the sober adventure/comedy/romance/jeans-wearing sequel The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2.

I imagine each film has a completely different audience, with one attracting stoners, fans of Judd Apatow-produced content, comedy nuts and the Girls Obsessed with Seth Rogen Association of America (or GOWSRAA), while the other looks to bring in pre-teen and teenage girls (and their parents) who like to watch other girls come of age and explore the rest of their lives ... or something like that. Word has it each flick is worthy of your nine bucks (I've seen Pineapple and can vouch for its coolness), so it's really about which movie fits your cinematic tastes.

So, what are you watching: Pineapple Express or The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2?

At least once every month -- and especially during the recent Apatow craze -- my friend and I briefly discuss the heartbreaking awesomeness that is The Last American Virgin (1982). Not only does this film feature one of the greatest soundtracks in movie history, but also included is this vicious tonal shift that sticks with you (in my case, for years and years ...). The flick came up once again in a conversation the other day, and only two hours later we received an email from a dude who wrote up a solid piece on the history of the Israeli teen sex comedy series Last American Virgin is based on, beginning with the one and only Lemon Popsicle (or Eskimo Limon) as it celebrates its 30th anniversary.

Consisting of nine different films, the Lemon Popsicle series is kinda like the American Pie series here in the states, except the former always focused on the same three guys and whatever horny misadventure they found themselves in at the time. Some suggest Lemon Popsicle inspired Porky's (released the same year as LP's American remake, Last American Virgin) -- which, of course, helped inspire the teen sex comedy genre going forward -- and there's no denying its influence on the future of the teen sex comedy; the pop-centric soundtrack, the awkward set of friends (fat guy, cool guy, nerd formula), the story beats (losing of virginity) and so on.

If you're a fan of the genre (and a lot of us are), definitely check out Oren's article, How To Stuff A Lemon Popsicle, over at Films in Review. What do you think? Without Lemon Popsicle, do you think we'd have films like Superbad?

As Hollywood is not an industry known for letting chick-lit properties slip through its proverbial fingertips, it should come as little surprise that the yay-for-life bestseller "Eat, Pray, Love" -- a memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert about her quest for peace in those three forms following her divorce -- is being indeed developed into a movie by Paramount, with Julia Roberts attached to star and a 2010 release date as rumored by the good ol' IMDb.

What's of arguably greater interest in this Hollywood Reporter piece is the fact that Warner Bros. has already snatched up rights to comedian Andrew Gottlieb's riff on the memoir, titled "Eat, Play, F*ck". The novel, to be published early next year, follows a man from Ireland to Vegas to Thailand as he seeks similar solace once his wife leaves him.

On the one hand, I'm all for snark, especially in response to such pre-programmed feel-good fare. On the other, this seems like a flash-in-the-pan proposition, unless "Love" hits it big and "F*ck" follows fairly soon after (ain't that usually how it goes?).

What say you, readers, about either project? I fully expect the typical fan defenses to crop up, but did any woman out there read that book and happen to be unimpressed? How about any guys who picked it up and couldn't put it down? Let's mix things up here, people!

In a world where many people aren't too keen on voracious reading, Haruki Murakami exists in an ultra-rare common ground that bringsliterary fiends together with casual readers, in what the Virginia Quarterly Review describes as "easily accessible, yet profoundly complex" writing (Wikipedia intro). But even with worldwide, far-reaching popularity, Murakami has been pretty particular about adaptations of his work, only allowing a few short films to get made. Until now, that is.

Finally, HK is getting the feature treatment, should planning go well. Variety reports that French-Vietnamese director Tran Anh Hung is planning to adapt Norwegian Wood. I would imagine that a script must have been whipped up, although there is no mention of it in the report, because they're already looking to get this into production in Japan this February, for a 2010 release.

If you happen to be one of the few who is unfamiliar with the story, the novel focuses on a man named Toru Watanabe who is catapulted to memories of his youth in the '60s when he hears an orchestral version of "Norwegian Wood" in Germany. As a teen, he was friends with two women, Kizuki and Naoko, until Kizuki kills herself and the two remaining friends tried to deal with the shocking loss. The pair fall in love, consummate the relationship, and then Naoko quits school and heads to a sanitarium to try and deal with her problems. Toru, meanwhile, starts to fall for Naoko's opposite -- an outgoing girl called Midori.

In the meantime, you can watch a short film based on one of Murakami's best short stories, On seeing the 100% perfect girl on beautiful April morning, here.

What is the appropriate reaction to have when a movie you love, adore, and cherish is somehow ... improved? I know, it's a strange feeling. I happen to think my all-time favorite film (A L I E N) is much better in its theatrical version than in its extended -- but where Aliens is concerned, I much prefer the longer version! It's something you have to approach on a case-by-case basis, of course, and it's the sort of movie-nerd activity that should be attempted only by those with a lot of free time -- or someone who gets paid to write about this sort of stuff. (Fortunately I am both.)

So it was with MUCH enthusiasm that I sat down with the brand-new Director's Cut of Dark City, a film that I absolutely love a whole lot -- and I know I'm not nearly alone when I say that. Like many of the finest sci-fi films, Dark City was pretty much overlooked for a good long while -- put once it hit DVD and heavy rotation on the cable channels, the sci-fi freaks found a film worth watching and re-watching, to say nothing of analyzing, deconstructing, and debating. And so I happily continue that trend by explaining what the fans will find in New Line's very impressive new Dark City package...

Ladies (and gentlemen), start your drooling. Entertainment Weekly has two new photos from Baz Luhrmann's romantic epic Australia, and if the photo to your right is any indication; this is going to be one sexy flick. Back in June the film was the subject of a photo shoot for Vogue, and those images were stunning (and pretty romantic). This latest photo, though, has a little more carnality on the brain. Mind you, I'm not complaining; anything that facilitates a half-naked Hugh Jackman is okay by me.

News about the film has been pretty scarce, but we do know that Stuart Beattie's (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) script centers on an English lady (Nicole Kidman) left in control of a cattle station in Australia during WWII. When a drover (played by Jackman) shows up to help her bring the cattle across the country, their relationship becomes something more -- and judging from that photo, there's going to be a lot more.

Its been a bumpy road for Luhrmann's epic; there have been casting changes, and the occasional act of god. But don't feel bad, the film also has a lot of things going for it: namely that epic romances sell, especially during Oscar season. Australia will arrive in theaters on November 14th, 2008.

Now it's your turn, do you think Australia could be the landlubber's Titanic at the box-office this fall? Sound off below...

Devout fans of Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight Saga" might not appreciate the comparisons, but it's easy to see from the outside that the books are being treated by the entertainment industry like the second coming of Harry Potter. Only with vampires instead of wizards. Yet despite all the excitement surrounding tomorrow's release (or tonight's release, if you're a real fan) of Meyer's fourth and final installment, "Breaking Dawn," I don't see the series really being as successful. I can't imagine a whole new Twilight-themed music genre forming, for instance ("vampire rock" would just be goth rock, anyway). And even with all the screams heard in Hall H last week during the Twilight panel at Comic-Con, I don't believe the movie is going to be anywhere as big as Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (I see it maybe clearing half of Sorcerer Stone's $318 mill. domestic take).

If the first Twilight movie is big enough to warrant further adaptations of the Saga, the franchise could possibly see itself being compared to Harry Potter in another way, at least if Meyer has any say in the way "Breaking Dawn" makes it to the big screen. Similar to how the seventh and final Potter novel, "Deathly Hallows" is being split in half for two separate films (the first part will be released in December 2010, with the second part arriving six months later), Meyer tells MTV that there needs to be two separate movies made out of the final book in her series. And she knows exactly where the story should be split (see if you can figure out where while reading the book this week), which makes me wonder why she didn't just write five books rather than four.

To hear the suggestion straight from the author's mouth, check out MTV's interview with Meyer after the jump.

Cinematical has just received this exclusive clip from In Search of a Midnight Kiss, which opens in two NYC theaters today (IFC Center, Clearview Cinema) before expanding to other cities. Nothing but good buzz has been following this title around for well over a year now -- so much so that a slew of my friends have been itching for this flick to hit theaters. And I have very cool friends ... who like to do very cool things ... just so you know. The film, which is set on New Year's Eve, follows around two misanthropes who meet online with each in search of something a little more fulfilling out of life. It's currently running at 90% over on Rotten Tomatoes (excellent for a small indie like this), where folks are comparing it to films like Woody Allen's Manhattan, Swingers and Before Sunrise. Seems like a great date movie, so if you're in NYC tonight and looking for that first kiss ... well, I think we know what you should be doing ...

Courtesy of MySpace, we bring you the trailer for Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist. While it looks to be a little more of one of those one-crazy-night comedies than I presumed it would be, there seems to be a sizeable chunk of hipster-teens-meet-cute hanging in there to keep things getting too wacky for its own good. After all, going off Eugene's From Page to Screen assessment, I still doubt this is as much in the same ball park as Superbad, or After Hours, or even Sex Drive -- and with any luck, that's for the best.

Playlist will premiere at Toronto this September before playing everywhere on October 3rd.

As both a cinephile and a candy freak, I get excited anytime there's a new movie-themed confection (as you can see from this Cinematical Seven from last Halloween). While some tie-ins are less tasty than others -- it's no wonder that the movie theater I worked at had trouble pushing Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans at the concession stand -- everything is worth sampling. And from time to time, some candies, such as the Star Wars prequel-inspired dark chocolate M&Ms and this summer's Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull-themed Snickers Adventures Bar, end up being far better than the movie they're helping to market.

Being apparently one of the few people who has no interest in Twilight whatsoever, I'm sure to feel the same way about a new tie-in from Godiva, which MTV Movies Blog excitedly spotlighted this morning. It's actually more related to the books, as its packaging features the cover of the first book in Stephanie Meyers' popular series. And Barnes and Noble will begin selling them tomorrow in connection with this weekend's release of the fourth book of the Twilight Saga, "Breaking Dawn." However, you could certainly stock up now (they're probably a limited edition item), so that you can sneak one into the cinema each of those hundreds of times you'll be sitting through Twilight the movie this December. Or maybe a smart theater chain will sell them at their concession stand, to avoid having fans smuggle in contraband candy (if you know me well, you know I don't like to encourage sneaking snacks). Keep in mind, though, that there's nothing entirely special about this bar, except that it has a special Twilight-themed sleeve. Otherwise it's just simply Godiva's boring (yet delicious) old milk chocolate bar.

The ol' quote goes: "Nobody puts Baby in the corner." These days, however, it might be more appropriate to say that nothing can keep Patrick Swayze down. The actor's initial cancer reports sounded so very grim, but there Swayze is, looking pretty darned healthy and kicking the big C right in the keister.

He's currently filming the A&E series The Beast in Chicago, and now insiders have told the Metro that he may go back to the role that made him uber famous. The insider said: "It's great news that Patrick is so well and there are lots of offers for him. Everyone wants him to star in a Dirty Dancing sequel. It's just a matter of him making his mind up."

We should take this with a grain of salt, but for once, I'm not totally against the news. If done right, and with a lot of the actors from the original, it could be great to watch them dance again. But then I get to thinking about WHEN it would have to take place. It's been 21 years since the original, which was set in the '60s. So that means it'd have to be a flick taking place in the '80s...

Would you want to see Johnny Castle don a Flock of Seagulls 'do and dirty dance again?

Do you ever get the feeling that you are completely out of step with the rest of your demographic? Well, I frequently do, especially since I sat down with fellow members of the female persuasion to watch Sex and the City -- talk about being a stranger in a strange land. So, you can understand why I will probably be avoiding the latest addition to the so-called chick flick cannon like the plague. Variety reports that Donald Petrie (director of such classics as Miss Congeniality, Just My Luck, and How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days) has signed to direct the literary adaptation, Fashionistas.

Danny Fischer and Paula Chorley will be writing the script based on Lynn Messina's debut novel. Fashionistas centers on a young go-getter at a fashion house who conspires to take down her demanding boss by inventing a fictitious designer. The whole thing sounds like a little bit of Devil Wears Prada mixed with a dash of All About Eve; and without the genius of Meryl Streep or Bette Davis, I think Fashionistas will probably suffer by comparison.

Fashionistas was originally set up at Paramount, but the studio has since dropped the production and the project will now be produced independently. Since I haven't read Messina's book, I guess it could be considered unfair of me to dismiss its 'literary efforts'. But, as a general rule, any book endorsed by Lindsay Lohan is not the book for me.

Fashionistas is expected to begin production later this year.

Some might question whether Brideshead Revisited, the classic novel by Evelyn Waugh, needed to be revisited in a film adaptation; the novel, after all, has been adapted once before in a lengthy and well-beloved British television serial. Fortunately for fans of Waugh's work, this film version of Brideshead, directed by Julian Jarrold (Kinky Boots, Becoming Jane) off a screenplay written by Jeremy Brock and Andrew Davies, is beautifully shot, painstakingly directed, and well worth watching. For the most part, the filmmakers avoid mutilating Waugh's work, although the end result does place a greater emphasis on certain aspects (romance) and limit or eliminate others altogether (the brilliantly written discourses on religion and love that permeate the book).

The film is shot in Castle Howard, also the setting for the miniseries version, and Brideshead itself is a majestic, imposing character that looms over all who encounter it. The screenplay is rather a masterful adaptation; the film handles the compression of years through the storyline with a bit of book-ended time-jumping to both introduce us to the lead characters and close out the story, and Brock and Davies do an able job of whittling the story down to meet the needs of a cinematic experience without losing the feel of Waugh's novel in the process.

Honestly, by now, I think we've all lost that lovin' feeling.

It wouldn't surprise me in the least to hear that folks were mulling a sequel to the 1986 romantic fighter jet flick. Not only are sequels to older films hot these days (see: Indiana Jones 4, Rocky 6, Die Hard 4), but Tom Cruise could provide a real boost to his rep if he were to revisit the character that kinda made him. Whether or not it would actually turn out to be a good movie is a whole different conversation. First off, according to those extremely reliable cats at The Sun, a script outline for Top Gun 2 is done and "movie bosses" want Cruise to star.

Apparently a source said this about the plot: "The idea is Maverick is at the Top Gun school as an instructor - and this time it is he who has to deal with a cocky new female pilot." Ooohh, original ... and spicy! It's like Karate Kid 4 meets A Really Big Paycheck for Tom Cruise! And yet ... we'd all still see it. Why are we such suckers? We currently have no idea how real this rumor is, so for the time being I wouldn't exactly break out into song and dance. Maybe it'll happen, maybe it won't.

What say you? Could this be the sequel we've subconsciously been waiting for our entire lives?